Thanksgiving

Today just sucks, my dad is not here and he would so love to have his pecan pie.  He would only have wanted that, maybe the angels made him a pie.  I remember one time when I was a kid and dad was going to school in OKC at the FAA Academy he had the flu and it was Thanksgiving. He suggested to mom we go out to eat and he only wanted his pecan pie. 

And today my refrigerator died, no more death in my life, be it people, or material objects,  I am not a fan of stores being open on holidays because it is all about the greed, but today I am thankful Best Buy is open so I can get the process started of me getting a new one.  This one only lasted 10 years, I expect at least 20 and these things ain't cheap either.

What I am most thankful for today is the day before my father's demise started we spent the day together.  We go to the dentist together and although he hated going there he loved them and they loved him right back. Because it took longer for me than him they would sit him out front and give him coffee and a cookie.  We went to Panera for lunch as it was in between our doctor appointments. He had his coffee and potato soup and we split a sugar cookie. Then he had a cardio appointment and got a clean bill of health.  We had so much fun and solved the world's problems and just enjoyed the day together.  I never figured it would be the last time I would spend with my dad that he would know who I was and be well enough that we could enjoy the day together.  Thank you God for letting me have this one last day on earth with my dad. 

Thanksgiving Proclamation

If you have never read this go here and see what Lincoln did for Thanksgiving.  Thank you Mrs Hale.

http://www.abrahamlincolnonline.org/lincoln/speeches/thanks.htm

Acceptance

I was looking through some old magazines mom had in a stack and found this:  It is from Eleanor Roosevelt.

You have to accept whatever comes, and the only important thing is that you meet it with the best you have to give.

Sounds like something my dad would have told me. 

Feeling All Alone

Today it is dark and cloudy and there are threats of that white stuff that my dad and I hated so much, yep snow.  I got 2 pieces of mail on how to deal with the loss of a parent.  I don't need a book or pamphlet to tell me how I might feel or how to deal with it, I need my dad back.  I am not one to feel alone or lonely but today I do.  More cards of beautiful words from people wanting me to now they are thinking of me and praying for me.  I don't feel any of the stages except I just miss my dad.  I know he is at peace now and that is what is best for him but... I don't have anyone to watch baseball with any more, or cuss at the democrats for how they are ruining the country, or solve the world's problems, or him sharing his chocolate with me, or us sneaking a cup of coffee in the afternoon when mom is not home, or all the other simple things we did.  Is it supposed to hurt this much, like my heart has been ripped out.  I just miss my dad. 

CFA I Apologize

I wondered when word came about CFA not supporting 2 Christian based organizations and dropped them like a hot potato.  I got caught up in the left trying to get me to divorce myself from my fav fast food restaurant.  So I apologize and will not be giving them up.  Here is the real truth.

Chick-fil-A made commitments to the Fellowship of Christian Athletes and to the Salvation Army in the past. Their giving model was multi-year commitments, which varied with each charitable organization. These terms were always communicated clearly to the recipients in writing. Again, I know this first hand. Such was the case with the 2 organizations mentioned above. CFA’s commitments to them have reached their term and are now over. CFA is in no way obligated to continue to give to any organization into perpetuity. So while you may be hearing that “Chick-fil-A “dropped” these organizations suddenly,” and then infer (quite wrongly) that it is due to a shift in values or capitulation to the LGBTQ mafia, that is simply not the case.
What’s changed is not CFA’s mission or values, but their giving strategy. Their express desire is to reevaluate their giving annually. They’ve stated that the $9million they’ve set aside in 2020 will go to youth education, combatting youth homeslessness, and fighting hunger. Ok. Doesn’t get my engine revving, but ok...not my call to make. I get to decide where the Satterfield family and Emmaus Road Church gives and where we focus. I don’t get to decide for CFA.
To some, it appears to be capitulation, and I understand that feeling. But know that it is merely a feeling - a suspicion, a misgiving, an impression. If you haven’t been in the top-level meetings, or heard first-hand from those who were that this whole thing is driven by the fear of the Left, then you have NO BUSINESS speculating to the detriment of a company that has only been faithful to Biblical principles for 73 years.

Dear Chick Fil A

We are done.  You have always been my favorite fast food place.  I stayed when you got rid of my chicken salad sandwich and cole slaw.  I waited in line one day for 45 minutes when the left went to attack you.  But now you have done it.  You have caved to the left and I can only imagine you will lose a lot of us who have always stood beside you.  So as much as I hate to I am leaving. 

Make it Stop

Yesterday as I finished moving mom out of the apartment she shared with dad I felt like I was saying goodbye to my dad all over again.  Then I found out the lady I sat by at church for years who I loved died of pneumonia yesterday morning.  She was such a sweet lady.  It had got to the point where she could not help with the sales anymore but she came in and packaged crackers in baggies for the lunch soup we served.  She did not think it was much but like I told her, I would have to pull someone off the floor helping set up for a couple hours and you save me from doing that.  What she did helped more than she thought.  RIP Vadeen, I loved you and our row at church will be so empty now. 

There's a Hole in my Heart

There's a hole in my heart
That can only be filled by you
 And this hole in my heart
Can't be filled with the things I do. 

My father died a week ago today.  There is a huge hole in my heart that will never be repaired.  He was 95 1/2 and lived a hell of a life.  It was so sudden he fell and broke his hip and never came home after 10 days of being in ICU and hospice.  He had dementia, afib, and had to use a walker to walk.  I was going to have to put him in Memory Care soon and he would have hated it. 

His brother and sister and parents went before him.  He had not seen his sister for almost 60 years. I can only imagine the beautiful reunion between them.  He always hated he never got to spend much time with her here on earth.

He is whole again and is well, no more diseases that can't be cured.  I miss you dad so much, you were my best friend we could talk about anything, you gave me advice, taught me how to take care of myself and to be strong.  My mom always said you are just like your dad, that made me so happy.  I love you dad and am so proud to be your daughter.  Someday I will see you again and we can solve the world's problems.  Until then...