Signs

Sign over a Gynecologist's Office:
'Dr. Jones, at your cervix.'
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In a Podiatrist's office:
Time Wounds All Heels.
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On a Septic Tank Truck:
Yesterday's Meals--on Wheels
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At a Proctologist's door:
To expedite your visit, please back in.
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On a Plumber's truck:
We Repair What Your Husband Fixed
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On another Plumber's truck:
Don't sleep with a drip; Call your plumber!


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On a Church's Billboard:
7 days without God makes one weak.
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At a Tire Shop inMilwaukee:
Invite us to your next blowout.
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At a Towing company:
We don't charge an arm and a leg: We want tows.
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On an Electrician's truck:
Let Us Remove Your Shorts
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In a Nonsmoking Area:
If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.
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On a Maternity Room door:
Push. Push. Push!
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At an Optometrist's Office:
If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place.
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On a Taxidermist's window:
We really know our stuff.
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On a Fence:
Salesmen Welcome! Dog Food Is Expensive!
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At a Car Dealership:
The best way to get back on your feet: miss a car payment.
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Outside a Muffler Shop:
No appointment necessary; We hear you coming.
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In a Veterinarian's waiting room:
Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!
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At the Electric Company
We will be de-lighted if you send in your payment.
However, if you don't, you will be.
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In a Restaurant window:
Don't stand there and be hungry; come on in
And get fed up.
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In the front yard of a Funeral Home:
Drive carefully! We'll wait...
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At a Propane Filling Station:
Thank heaven for little grills.
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And don't forget the sign at a
CHICAGO RADIATOR SHOP:
Best place in town to take a leak
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Sign on the back of another Septic Tank Truck:
CAUTION - This Truck is Full of Political Promises